in everything

There is a time for everything...

In this life, if I do not know the character of God, I would be swept away by the negatives of this world.

Because God is amazing; He always provides a way out.

-----x------

A household with a husband in a newly married set-up is tough.

Even the way I cut the garlic or the onions for that adobong pusit recipe can be an issue; and if I would dwell on it, it can lead to arguments and other complications.
ANSWER: Compromise.
But sometimes, the way to make a compromise is so difficult also. Voice and tone check; breathing check and the eyebrows positioned not high above the forehead.


Grocery time is no different either... why would I want to buy more than two packages of toothpaste?! or the kind of fish that we need to buy in the market... "you ask me what I want, and then when I make my choice, .... you have all sorts of excuses not to buy it.... why don't you go ahead with the purchase?!"


-----x-----


Realization: Between hubby and I, I am no longer the "kuripot" that I thought I was...

Next time, that portion for savings goes to hubby. No questions ask.

So, What Now?

I have been sad borderline frustrated about how the Team is handling my case. They are still "talking" about my application for admitting privileges. They asked the Department of Family Medicine to furnish them with an guidelines for admissions, for which I helped in drafting.  I can only guess about their perception of Family Medicine. Is this about patient turfing? I don't know, because I feel its too lame to be used as an excuse. After all, it is a specialty both here and abroad, even qualified to be gatekeepers of health care in Europe. Patience is a virtue.

 ____x____

I received two significant emails today that got me excited; which I am taking as one of the unique ways God is encouraging me to pursue what He has prepared for me. 

1.   A patient with chronic pain from the United States inquired through the Filipino Doctor for a physician who could help him with his pain as he is preparing to spend his retirement in Dumaguete City. I hope I will be able to practice what I have learned from my fellowship on pain management. Most importantly, that I can make a difference in the life of this patient and his family.

2. The most exciting of it all, is knowing that a Sillimanian based abroad, is interested in starting a community palliative care program. I have committed to help her in this endeavour. Based on this first exchange, she wanted to start by educating the students and the Silliman community about what palliative care is and its goals. 

_____x_____

Julius and I are currently in the "medical process" of finding out if we can have children or not. We have been married for almost three years and there is no sign of a baby yet. Hopeful.

____x____

People and circumstances may delay it but truly they could not stop it.

Its my 33rd

Other people would want to keep it a secret but NOT me.
I love April 20. I appreciate the date. I am thankful that there is such a date.

Its not about the big celebrations but the joy of having people remember me in this crazy, hurried world - that  IT IS MY BIRTHDAY!

There are only two birthday parties that really stood out in my memory.
One, is on my 7th birthday, when I had a big children's party at the backyard of my grandparents house in Butuan City. But that is not what made the day special, its because of that extra birthday cake that my Tito Dongkoy and Tito Honey had for me. A rectangular buttercake with white icing and green trimmings on the side. We enjoyed the cake in the evening with 3 or 4 of my childhood friends around. Yayang, Honey and the other two... I wish I had kept that picture taken in the sala of the house that I called home for the first nine years of my life. I was told that the house is no longer there.The street of Del Pilar is no longer the same. 
Second, is on my 18th year, in MSU, a generous gift from Tita Mila and Tito Lando. Classmates from summer class were present, and I distinctly remember, being worried, that food would run out. I don't usually have classmates on my birthday. They did sang songs -"harana."

My parents were not with me on these dates. =(
Its far too complicated to  write. For now.
Daddy, Mommy and Mama have died already. 
My sister, Wela, who was born on April 19, 364 days after me, has a baby of her own.
Papa has a family of his own with four more kids.
...

There will always be lessons.
 




...
I started the day singing "Happy Birthday to me...." and my husband joining "Happy Birthday to you...."

...
Patiently waiting.


  

Clinic Hours

My husband would have preferred for me to have the usual out-patient clinic hours that other physicians keep -  the nine to five thing with lunch break in between and the occasional after office hours consultations. Instead, I am keeping a twelve noon to nine in the evening clinic from Monday to Saturday. It is unconventional but it does serve its purpose(s).

The hospital I am affiliated with is trying to up-build her emergency and ambulatory care services. Based on the patient census, this is the time wherein most patients and their families would come to the ER for consultations; and they are not necessarily emergency cases. Most of the time, its either their preferred physicians are no longer holding clinic for the day or has reached a limit in the number of patients to be seen for the day. Or they just do not want to wait, period. The "OPD-ER Extension Clinic" will decongest the ER of the non-emergency cases- somehow discipline the clients about emergency cases vs ambulatory cases. 

This schedule has also allowed me to have late mornings, spending it with my husband over brunch in most days of the week. I can also schedule errands/other appointments in the morning;  and starting this June, I can hold classes in the medical school in the morning. The morning is also spent catching up with other administrative work for the residency training program.

Since I have always believed that there is always a time and a season for everything, I am pretty sure that there will be more reasons for me to keep this schedule in the days to come. And yes, my husband has come to accept this schedule and has also found ways to "complement" my schedule.  

 

definitions

Palagaylay - is a term that I first came to understand when I started my post-graduate training at Silliman University Medical Center in Dumaguete City. It could mean dilly-dallying, dragging your feet or delaying.

And it is something I wanted to do after a week of hospital work. ",)

Shout Out for 2012: Joshua 1:9

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

 Thank you to the Silliman University Church Service today for this reminder. I am truly blessed.

++++++++++

 The year 2012 started with a challenge - how to pack all the materials things that I have accumulated during my fellowship year in Manila without earning the ire of my patient husband - and I failed. I had to pay a considerable amount of money to Cebu Pacific for the excess baggage. Countless times has my reminded me to send some of these things ahead of time but I procrastinated. Yes, I have to admit that I really am a Hoarder and I hope to make every effort to improve.

++++++++++++

I have been told by those who have come before me that I will face the considerable task of making palliative care be known, understood and accepted in Dumaguete City. I had to prepare myself; and I knew, even at the beginning, that could not do it possibly do it alone. It is in the moments of hesitation that I became more conscious of the people and circumstances that God has presented to me. 

++++++++++

 The most basic virtues still apply - patience and perseverance, humility and love.

 

Regrets

12 11 2011

The stay in Manila for the UP-PGH Fellowship Training in Supportive Hospice and Palliative Medicine has been financially tough for my husband and I. The reality is, the income that we are earning, when spent in Dumaguete City is far more rewarding than when spent here in Metro Manila. Dumaguete City is not the boondocks but we can get around the city just by walking or talking the pedicab; and it would not take us forever to get from one place to another. We have the convenience of cooking our own food rather than go for “dine in” or “take out;” Not be crammed in an apartment with many restrictions. But don’t get me wrong, with almost a year done here in Manila, I am grateful for the people we have met, the places we have visited and the events we have attended. The fun and excitement of discovery is something that cannot be bought or even exchanged.

A.      A. On Moonlighting and Relieving

Among the many experiences I gained here in Manila was the opportunity to go into relieving/moonlighting duties. Straight from passing the physician licensure examinations, I went to residency training in Surgery then Family Medicine. My idea of moonlighting/relieving/racket stemmed from the accounts of friends and seniors. The monetary compensation was good and you have the opportunity to do 2-3 duties. The downside is, well, the travel time and there is no “permanency.”

On three occasions (2 at the BoomLand Kart Track for a Motorcycle Race and 1 WiLLing WiLLie Anniversary at Smart Araneta Coliseum), I was able to work with STAT Med – an ambulance service with its own team of EMTs.  I had fun and the pay was just enough at P2500 for 8-10 hours of work with free meals. But, according to my companions who seem to be “perennieals” in the moonlighting/relieving seen – the pay is just small. That is okay with me, though, because they allowed my husband to tag along and I get to see the “artistas.” Happy na ako dun.

The other thing is my not so nice experience with the racket at Slimmers World which I ‘inherited’ from one of my companions. The schedule is on Tuesdays and Thursdays, 6-8 o’clock in the evening for P8000 which translates to about P500/duty. The work is not that tedious –physical examination for those wanting to enroll in their fitness program with a few consults here and there. I shared this duty with a resident – she takes the Tuesdays and I do the Thursdays.  Before I accepted to take this job, I knew for a fact that there was always a delay in giving out the cheque, about two weeks late, and if you will not follow it up with the assistant manager/accounting, it may take longer than that. I always hear Aliza complain about the delay. In our case, the cheque is placed under the name of the resident, because the management would only want one name. Logistics, I suppose.

December 8, 2011 – on this fateful day, I have come to realize that I have had enough of the delaying tactics; being treated like ‘second’ class, not being compensated for what I have studied and trained for. “Cge, kahit hindi sa pina-trainingan ko, kahit sa paging doctor na lang…”   I am a specialist, a diplomate member of the largest medical specialty society in the Philippines. I thought it is about time to stand up for my ‘rights.’ Having said that, I do remember enjoying the duties that I had and fondly thinking that it is all well with me if there is a delay in the handing out of the cheque; so, I could just forget about it and place it under savings. The problem now was I did not give them the two-week notice; I just did not show up. At siyempre nagalit sila. I just said I am sorry. Simple; rather than risk saying something that is not called for.

However, when I learned from Loida, that our October and November salaries have only just been processed last December 6, 2011…. Grrrrrrrr! What are these people doing with our time cards of the last two months??? I felt really bad and quite frankly, I regretted not saying this to their face. Abuso na ito! Wala po akong ma-recommend na doctor po sa inyo kasi nakakahiya ang pasahod niyo at na-dedelay pa.

B.     B.  BPI Express Deposits

No matter how advanced the technology is, it still needs a good head to be able to operate it =)

I was eager to show my husband how to make a deposit on an automated teller machine but I made the mistake of not arranging the bills properly without the “kunot.” The machine ended up “eating” most the bills and was not posted to my account. To state the obvious, “syempre;” my husband scolded me for my carelessness and impatience – “Why didn’t I wait for morning to do the transaction..?”

I immediately sent an email to the bank and posted in twitter… in less than 24 hours, I received a call from a bank representative and promised to settle it in 3-4 banking days. And Promise Fulfilled.

Lesson Learned.

Roaming and Eating Around

November was a busy month - both on the home front and at work.

 There was the going home to Dumaguete City for the elective and research matters.

Morning Snacks

The UP-PGH DFCM Post-Graduation Course at the Hyatt Hotel and Casino....

Happy Birthday, my Love (November 16, 2011)!!!

The Weekend Birthday CeLebration for Julius; and his wish to savor the Crispy Pata at Buddy's Restaurant-Kakatong Branch.
How could I possibLy resist that face?

The Crispy Pata was 9/10 on the NRS... but the quantity was just too much for both of us to finish. We had the left-overs for breakfast on the following day.

The truth is, we have been going to Buddy's for almost two months now - after going through the "ChicBoy" phase.

Doctor Ellen and Sir Lims, both of whom my mentors while I was reviewing for the diplomate board examinations.

Along with other doctors, I got invited to lunch at Mangan. I had this for dessert -the bibingka and the puto bumbong!

The Pinoy Christmas Scene

Julius and I paid the entrance fee of 10 pesos so we could get into the trade fair at SM MegaMall Building B Megatrade Hall 2 - The Buy Pinoy Exporters Fair.
 
Julius got so excited when he found out that there was a booth catering to the "how to make the fabric softener and dishwashing detergent...."  He had been talking about it for months already where he could possibly learn how to do it.

 We were there on the second and on the third day.
The second day was to buy some kakanin that we could bring to our DGroup meeting at CCF , St. Francis Square. It turned out to be a "Sweets Festival, " with our cassava cake and leche flan, completing the Goldilocks cathedral and apple pie. We met new companions, too - Juvy and Alfred and Maricel.

The third day was for Julius and his seminar/demo on the fabric softener and dishwashing liquid. He is having some business ideas now. i hope this will push through in God's own perfect time.

TAkoyaki Balls for me!

Julius would always pick me up from the hospital in the afternoon. Robinsons Place in Ermita, Manila has become our go-to place before going home (along with the rest of PGH staff!)



And this is what we usually have----

The Green Mangoes at Mangoong for him

But, on the weekends... SM Megamall Food Court is our place.

The Megastar was around during this time - attending the launching of some brand of cooking ware.










It is still the "mangoong" for him... and I have just recently discovered the NYFD french fries and dips...
... next time it will will be the garlic sauce or the pepperoni or...

On the MRT Platform at Buendia station; I thought it was Ayala station already - sowi, manong!

And this is us, while waiting for my most favorite mode of public transportation  - the train.


Fellowship training is about to finish; graduation day, December 15, is just around the corner -
I am thanking the Lord now for allowing me to live and experience Metro Manila; not aLone but with my husband.

His Agenda

Julius and I are having our own countdown: the end of my fellowship training… 

December 31 days plus November 30 days plus 4 remaining days of October EQUALS 65 days to go!!!!! Yahoo!!!

… and the start of my own Family Medicine and Palliative Care practice in Dumaguete City.

On October 16, 2011, the Lord answered a very specific prayer – for Julius and me to recommit ourselves together into the saving grace and mercy of Jesus.

Our stay in Metro Manila had not been as smooth as I wanted it to be; to be in training at the country’s premier hospital and training institution has its own difficulties but it cannot be compared to the hardships of just being a husband waiting for his wife to come home after a day of hospital work. You see, Julius, is the type of guy who prides himself of making ends meet all by his own efforts. He thinks of himself as a self-made man.

Trouble ensued between the two of us right after he began to experience all the symptoms of hypo/hyperthyroidism after a total thyroidectomy. No matter how I try with various visual aids, he could not understand the “timpla-timpla” that doctors do about his levothyroxine medications. All of these symptoms are what’s keeping him from going back to seaman work. He kept on worrying about finances while I exhaust myself on explaining to him evidence-based medicine.

On this particular Sunday while we were attending the CCF church service in Ortigas and Ray An Fuentes was preaching, the Lord started to work in our hearts. He revealed His kingdom agenda of a worry-free life through Matthew 6:31-33. The lesson was for us to recognize the three areas on which we worry the most: the basic necessities, our treasures, and money. It is to “seek first His Kingdom” – this should be our focus, on what He wants to do rather than what we want to do for ourselves. We now understand that we are not guaranteed a problem-free earthly life but if we want a worry-free life, we should focus on God’s agenda. By God’s grace, He will back us up when we set our hearts and pursue His kingdom and his righteousness.

The next Friday afterwards, we were able to join a D-group meeting, led by the couple (Jhun and Cristy), where we met other couples who are living testimonies of God’s faithfulness.     

We are not quite there yet but we are certain of the promise that He will see us through - God’s work in progress.